But it isn’t too late to reverse course.
Serving children should not be controversial. We all agree on that. But it is controversial to scorn the wisdom of God, to willfully deprive children, who have no choice in the matter, of either a father or mother, and to place them in a household that violates Christian standards, no matter how loving it may be.
—Dr. Michael Brown, in an open letter to the leadership of Bethany Christian Services—
Key point: To place children in homes of same-sex couples, even loving ones, cannot be loving, nor can it be Christian. Why? Because placing them there ignores the truth that a family is a man and a woman committed to each other in marriage for life and the children that result from their union or that they adopt. Love can never promote a lie, and same-sex marriage is, quite simply, a lie.
On March 1, 2021, this headline appeared at the top of an online article published by the New York Times:
Major Evangelical Adoption Agency Will Now Serve Gay Parents Nationwide
This explanation appeared right under the headline:
The decision comes as more cities and states require organizations to accept applications from L.G.B.T.Q. couples or risk losing government contracts.
Are government contracts really worth it? I’m asking this rhetorically. Certainly I understand the desire to place as many children as possible in loving homes, and I understand fully that same-sex couples can be loving parents who are deeply concerned for their adopted children. This, however, is not the issue. Bethany Christian Services is an adoption agency that has the word Christian for its middle name.
Authentic Christians see all people as created in God’s image and believe everyone should be treated with dignity and respect, but they also understand that God has spoken clearly through nature and through His Word about what the family is and what it should be. Historic Christianity recognizes that this is an imperfect world and that the ideal for a child with regard to his or her parents — a married mom and dad — won’t always be a reality. Deaths occur. Divorce happens. Yet in single parent homes, at least the concept of a mom and a dad is upheld. Same-sex marriage, by its very nature, stands solidly against this notion.
Here is the truth: Two parents of the opposite sex are qualitatively different from two dads or two moms. Children need a both a male parent and a female parent. This is the reality, and to refuse to admit this, and especially to act otherwise, is to deny reality. Further, contrary to the prevailing cultural narrative, what a family is and what it should be is unambiguously clear.
Two parents of the opposite sex are qualitatively different from two dads or two moms. Children need a both a male parent and a female parent.
Niraj Warikoo, writing in the Detroit Free Press, reports,
“These days, families look a lot different than they did when we started” 75 years ago, said Nathan Bult, a spokesman for Bethany Christian Services, in a statement to the Free Press. “And Bethany is committed to welcoming and serving all of them.…The need is great, so we are taking an ‘all hands on deck’ approach.”
“We will begin implementing this practice nationwide immediately,” Bult added.
Bethany has been involved in legal battles to preserve its right to refer same-sex couples to other agencies in areas where it had contractual agreements with a state or a city. Michigan and Philadelphia were two such places. Facing mounting pressure, the adoption agency began to adjust its policies. In 2019 Bethany and Michigan reached a settlement in which Bethany agreed to work with homosexual couples wanting to adopt. Bethany expressed disappointment with the agreement, but this week, it has stated its intention to “expand this policy to all states it operates in.” The Michigan-based agency “has offices in 32 states.”
Chris Palusky is the agency’s CEO and president, and he emailed Bethany’s employees to tell them,
We will now offer services with the love and compassion of Jesus to the many types of families who exist in our world today. We’re taking an “all hands on deck” approach where all are welcome.
Surrendering, Even as Other Faith-Based Agencies Stand
If Bethany doesn’t reverse its new policy, it will leave high and dry other faith-based adoption agencies who are standing on principle. In November of last year, the Supreme Court heard oral arguments in a case involving Catholic Social Services (CSS) and the City of Philadelphia. CSS “sued the City of Philadelphia over its contract suspension….A ruling is expected by the end of June.”
Especially in our day, all serious Christians must stand together, and we must stand for what the Bible clearly teaches. Further, especially when challenged, we must and let the public know
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- that we know what the Bible teaches and
- that those tenets are of paramount importance to us.
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We will not abandon them but will continue to exercise our right to free speech to make the case for the family as God designed it.
What is especially tragic is that Bethany, which has a history of placing children that has lasted more than 75 years, is in a position to speak with great moral authority on what is best for children and on what creation teaches about the family. But so far, Bethany has squandered this opportunity and caved to the prevailing cultural narrative.
Seeing the push for same-sex marriage in the culture, family advocate Dr. James Dobson wrote this in 2004. His statements are as true today as they were then.
Children need a loving mother and father. A wealth of research over the past thirty years has shown this. The most loving mother in the world cannot teach a little boy how to be a man. Likewise, the most loving man cannot teach a little girl how to be a woman. A gay man cannot teach his son how to love and care for a woman, nor can a lesbian teach her daughter how to love a man or know what to look for in a husband. Is love enough to help two gay dads guide their daughter through her first menstrual cycle? Unlike a mom, they cannot comfort her by sharing their first experience. Little boys and girls need the loving daily influence of both male and female parents to become who they are meant to be.1
Photo by Drew Gilliam on Unsplash
Contending for the Truth
Christian leader and cultural observer Dr. Michael Brown wrote an open letter to Bethany Christian Services. In it he stated that he understood the agency had struggled with this issue for a good while, and he cited the same statement we quoted above from Bethany’s CEO and president Chris Palusky:
We will now offer services with the love and compassion of Jesus to the many types of families who exist in our world today. We’re taking an “all hands on deck” approach where all are welcome.
Then Dr. Brown wrote:
Dr. Michael Brown
But does the love and compassion of Jesus willfully place a child in an environment where he or she will be deprived of either a mother or a father? Does Jesus, in His love, want that child to be raised in an environment that, at best, is still deeply contrary to God’s design and order? And with ample studies indicating that children raised in same-sex homes tend to be much more open to sexual experimentation and gender confusion, are you ready to answer to the Lord for being the ones who placed them in this environment?
We all know that there are many, deeply devoted, caring same-sex couples. But that does not mean for a second that placing a child under their care is the best choice for that child, let alone what God would desire.…
[T]his [new policy] does anything but focus on serving children. Can you really say that the best you can do for a needy child is place them in a same-sex household?
It is only “progressive” Christianity that could affirm your new policy, a “Christianity” that flatly rejects the plain testimony of Scripture and the united testimony of the Church for two millennia.
God knows what is best for children and family, and He has plainly established the mother-father setting in the home. Or do you think that all your predecessors who held to these views were religious bigots and homophobes?…
I beg of you, in the sight of the Lord to whom we will all give account, to reconsider, repent, and return to your foundations. Both God and history will ultimately honor you if you do. And many, many children will be grateful as well.
I beg of you, in the sight of the Lord to whom we will all give account, to reconsider, repent, and return to your foundations. Both God and history will ultimately honor you if you do. And many, many children will be grateful as well.
—Dr. Michael Brown, to the leadership of Bethany Christian Services—
Take Action
Dr. Brown is absolutely right, and if you agree, Bethany Christian Services (BCS) needs to hear from you. You can call BCS toll free at 800.238.4269. You also can write them with pen-and-ink or electronically; contact information is available here.
Be kind, but be clear and firm. The policy needs to be reversed and the agency needs to work to preserve its religious liberty in serving children, adults, and the public at large.
Creation Doesn’t Lie, Nor Does Scripture
Here’s an article that you might find helpful. In part 2 of a series of Word Foundations articles titled “Myths that Led to the Recognition of Same-Sex Marriage in the United States” (published in 2017-2018) we debunked the following myths.
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- Myth: Sex differences are is absolutely meaningless in marriage.
- Myth: The fact that procreation occurs naturally only through heterosexual intercourse has nothing to do with marriage and the family.
- Myth: Sex differences are absolutely meaningless in parenting.
- Myth: Marriage is really all about adults—not children.
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Our culture — our increasingly godless society — is dying to hear the truth about the family. Are you familiar enough with the truth to articulate it? Are you willing to be an advocate for the truth?
Standing Dominoes
Another domino has fallen. Will you work with other believers to set it back up again? Will you work to keep the next one from falling?
God’s design for the family is at stake.
Copyright © 2021 by B. Nathaniel Sullivan. All rights reserved.
Note
1Dr. James Dobson, Marriage Under Fire: Why We Must Win this Battle, (Multnomah: Sisters, Oregon, 2004), 99.
top image credit: Dominoes in motion
image credit: standing dominoes
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